Category: Blog/All

  • Home Gym Review Series: The Platform

    Home Gym Review Series: The Platform

    I started building out my home gym in 2018, the Spring before my second child–Bee–was born. I figured it would make it far easier to get in workouts–with both my then-two year old Gee and a newborn Bee–if I could just go outside to my detached 2-car garage and bang out some sets.

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  • Breaking News: America’s Top Law Firms Don’t Know How a Protection Racket Works

    Breaking News: America’s Top Law Firms Don’t Know How a Protection Racket Works

    Welp, the other shoe has dropped. Two top law firms–Kirkland & Ellis and Paul, Weiss, Rifkind, Wharton & Garrison–are working for the Commerce Department for free, presumably working up trade agreements in connection with the president’s blatantly illegal tariffs. Previously both Kirkland and Paul Weiss cut deals with the administration after it levied punitive executive orders against them, with the firms pledging eight-figures worth of pro bono legal services and cuts to their DEI programs.

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  • The Dirty Kids (Part Three of Seven)

    The Dirty Kids (Part Three of Seven)

    After Spencer downed his bottle of Robitussin, they drove, skirting the edges of town, where the strip malls gave way to surrounding crops of corn and soybeans. They came across a 24-hour Meijer and wandered through aisles of blinding white fluorescence until, chastened by the black surveillance camera domes on the ceilings high above them, they hurried up to the automated checkout counter with their chosen wares: Spencer, a new Spalding basketball; and Sal, a mango he’d been carrying around the store clutched against his chest like a newborn. Then they got back into the car and headed back toward campus, taking bites out of the orange-green skin of mango and spitting chunks of pulp out of their windows. They laughed deliriously as Future’s “I’m Trippin’” played from Spencer’s playlist.

    Astronaut at the same time

    Gone to Mars at the same time

    Pluto Jupiter the same time

    Pick a planet the same time

    I’m trippin’, I feel ignorant

    Keep rollin’, keep sippin’

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  • The McDermott Discrimination Lawsuit

    The McDermott Discrimination Lawsuit

    As a former BigLaw associate and employment lawyer, I had thoughts on the recent discrimination lawsuit against McDermott, Will, and Schulte (known as McDermott, Will and Emery until a recent merger). You can find the lawsuit here, and it is a doozy.

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  • The Dirty Kids – Part Two (of Seven)

    The Dirty Kids – Part Two (of Seven)

    Spencer and Sal had known each other for as long as either could remember, but had only been friends since middle school.  Spencer grew up in a subdivision of well-manicured lawns and streets named after wildflowers. Sal lived across the thoroughfare, on a block populated by run-down apartment buildings and small, five-room houses with weed-choked lawns strewn with broken plastic toys and battered lawn furniture. 

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  • Introduction

    Introduction

    I am a Gen X lawyer, powerlifter, music afficionado, veteran record collector,  beginner guitar player, husband, and father (not in that order). I started writing short fiction in 1999, then took an extended break from 2002 until 2021, in which time I wasted my twenties partying in Chicago; got my JD from a Big Ten law school (summa cum laud for anyone keeping score); began my career with the prestigious, workaholic, and very evil law firm Wolfram & Hart*; got married and had two children; and nursed an ever increasing alcohol habit. 

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  • The Dirty Kids – Part One (of Seven)

    The Dirty Kids – Part One (of Seven)

    Spencer sat at the wheel of the Honda Civic his father had given him as a high school graduation present, holding an open eight-ounce bottle of Maximum Strength Robitussin in his lap.  It was mid-October—homecoming Saturday at the State University—and he had the engine running in the parking lot of a drugstore about a half mile off campus. 

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